anu kalikal

stories

2009-05-12T03:47:00.000-07:00

I ve freed the land
Of honesty and made
A king of myself.

I ve mastered an empty me
To let another you
grow within.

I ve killed the hand
that fed me and now
There is a guiltful pride
Sticking at edges
Of round pots of manure.

A number of years
A land of people
Here or there,
East or West
A common man in
A common world
With no commonness.

The Time

2009-05-12T03:27:00.000-07:00

Was there a tinkling of a bell
When cherubiums sang that Gabriel rang?
Quick soft feets climbed the air and
Blew the trumpet that spread the
Darkness into bright.

Lil manger well-prepared
Within the land of Bethlehem

BEAUTIFUL CHRISTIAN SISTER By Maya Angelou

2009-03-28T23:35:00.000-07:00

'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ That a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean living,' I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.
When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success.. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.
When I say.... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain... I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.
When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou, I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!
Pretty is as Pretty does... But beautiful is just plain beautiful!

Anjali

2009-03-27T22:46:00.000-07:00

She folded the pleats of her sari and tucked it into her underskirt. The hem of the cloth swayed at the wind from the table fan. Reaching out for her hair pin which lay on the side table, she hummed a romantic Malayalam poem, joining the rickety noise of the fan blades rotating. Adjusting her pallu to the right length she walked to the window to see if Shankar had finished washing the car .He had, and it was now drying in the morning summer heat of Chennai. The streets were slowly picking up in its jagaron and the sounds of flower vendors selling their wares could be heard occasionally. Anjali walked from the bedroom to the living room picking up her things and preparing for her day at college. mentally she was accessing if she had everything ready for today’s test she intended to give the post graduate students , she enjoyed walking into that class and being one with their thoughts , arguing and critiquing literary giants and legends and having the last say most of the time.

The clock chimed seven thirty; she picked her bag and walked to her amma’s room. Amma was lying in bed looking at Shankar watering the plants in the garden. Anjali walked up to her and placed her hand on amma s shoulder; she cleared her throat and waited for a reaction from amma. Noticing no change, anjali spoke “amma, I ve asked Shankar to buy the vegetables for the afternoon. Leela already knows what to do around the house. Please eat your breakfast without any fuss amma. don’t let me hear leela complaining about what a fussy eater my amma is .” still seeing no reaction from her she bend down to peck a kiss on her forehead . Anjali smiled to herself thinking about her mother’s stubbornness. She turned and walked out of the room. Taking the car keys from the key rack next to the book shelf, she walked out of the house. She got into her car and waved at Shankar and nodded her head simultaneously, her sign to indicate to him she will be back at the usual time from college. Shankar came running behind her car to close the gate once the car stepped into the road.

She reached college just when the morning bell was ringing. Walking towards the assembly area she scanned the crowd of students restlessly gathering for the morning prayers. It was a pleasant morning even though the heat was there. Anjali stood under the huge mango tree along with the other teachers. as the prayer song was being sung , anjali s mind was gently drifting to the activities of the previous day .she was jolted out of her thoughts when everybody started moving after the assembly was over. Anjali slowly started back to her staff room. Gopika her colleague came and walked beside her. “You ve all the hours today gopi?” “All except the third hour. I heard your giving a quick test to the pg s ?” “ only to sharpen their already quick minds gopi” they reached the room , anjali walked towards her chair at the head of the room . All the other teachers were slowly coming in twos and threes. Anjali looked out the main door of the staff room from her desk, a few children were standing outside waiting to see a particular teacher to clear doubts which were already cleared dozens of times. .

to-be -continued

Between you and me

2009-03-27T22:36:00.000-07:00

Between you and me
What are things? For we are friends.
Clubbed at the hip, you and I,
Facing each other eye to eye.
I see an ocean in you,
You see a dessert in me.
Am swimming without a life boat or jacket,
Alone my hands carry me on.
You reach your hand into me
And shake my bowels out.
I cough and gasp and
Wrap my hands against air I don’t have.
You stare and watch me drown
Going underneath the waters,
As I plummet, you come beside me
And watch my body seep into the world under.
You wave and see me off;
I go knowing you were a fraud.

I am standing

2009-03-27T22:34:00.000-07:00

I am standing in the middle of the road
Every car every bike zooms past me
I stand and they go. Invisible I
Cars grow wings and fly above me
The bikes jump like horses and gallop past me

I am walking in a narrow road
Filled with people all walking
All rushing to and from places.
They push me. Some thrust themselves into my shoulder
I just move on.

Take Your Foot Away…

2009-03-27T22:31:00.001-07:00

Take your foot
Away from mine,
The weigth has
Crushed my toes
My bones wail and weep;
Cant you hear them howl?

Your fingers have
Dug into my wrist
Eating my flesh ; devouring
With smirkiness my pain.
My body winces while
You roll with laughter
Go away from me,
Allow me to breathe.

Cruel and colourless
You are
My fingers grope
To squeeze you.
I feel my grip
Strapping against flesh
My blood dripping,
Between my fingers
Drowned in it
My desperation .

You’re a liar
And a cheat.
You steal and
Proclaim yourself winner;
One day
I will clobber you
And run away
Gleaming with pride.

I wonder….

2009-03-27T22:27:00.000-07:00

this is a poem by my dear freind anju. i ve loved the way she has asked the questions as we often do to dear Mr God.

I wonder what Joseph felt
as he lay there deep down in the well
would he have looked at the coined sky?
and wondered, “Why God? Why?”

I wonder what Hannah and Sarah felt
as they looked at their barren womb
when wounded by the snooping eyes
would they have wept and said,
“Have you forgotten me God?”

I wonder what Gladys Stains felt
when she saw the charred bodies of her beloved
would she have stifled a heart-rending groan?
and questioned, “Couldn’t you have stopped it Lord?”

I wonder how it feels
to have your entire family
washed off by a tsunami wave.

I wonder how it feels
to wake up one morning
and find yourself buried in the debris
as the earth quake in Bhuj.

I wondered and wondered for ages.
Till wisdom opened my eyes one day.
He stood by me and whispered,
“You see only a little piece of a jigsaw puzzle.
God sees the completed picture.”

Anju George
Vettinilkunnathil

Rohan’s land

2009-03-11T11:06:00.001-07:00

When rohan does not want to cry
Why does the world force him dry?
When he holds the lantern inside out
People trample way out loud.

Rohan whispers rohan cries
Today not tomorrow
Nor the mature dies

Rohan is happy, rohan is sad
Rohan is weepy, Rohan is glad.

There was no yesterday
There was no today
There was no tomorrow
In Rohan’s land.

The victor has come

2009-03-11T09:52:00.000-07:00

For every time the hand was held
For every second the hand was left
It has been a memory of days gone by
And day’s yet to come.
A prophesy from infant mouths.

The twirl of the finger into the hollow tree
The whisper of whiskers of a cats meow
The broken cup from a human hand
The sigh of a donkey’s back.

Wave the green flag, wave it high
There among the clouds he has sung
The music revels, the music pounds
Among the shelter of angelic crowns
Sigh of holiness. Signs of joy
A gladness resounding, within a world of rejoice

There among people long gone past
And among nations wiped clean of lands
The knots of strings of lyres and hands
Have formed the future and the midlands

Arise oh nation, arise oh child
The battle is over
The victor has come.

he

2009-02-07T03:10:00.000-08:00

Wrapped in muslin cloth was a baby
And seeing her was a two year old boy.
Wrapped in muslin cloth was a 25 year old
And seeing him was a 23 year old girl.

We have changed roles but our love has not.

the cord

2009-02-07T02:55:00.000-08:00

Am drawn to butterflies,gums and even Vcr's.
Their oddness makes my life more realistic
And me more life-like.
A thin cord connected me at birth
And now like others I walk on a tight cord
To entertain the world, women and money.

We keep looking for the cord that kept us alive
When we knew nothing.

memories

2009-02-07T02:48:00.000-08:00

Somethings get washed from our memory while some remain stained. In the end ourlife becomes a bedspread lying idle from all that was poured into it with purpose.

this is a new day

2008-12-31T05:37:00.000-08:00

Today i sit down to write on the last day of this yr. this day does not mark any difference to me from any other days. it does not tell me that i ve to change today and tomorrow be the same ,it does not tell me that i am weak or great . No, it simply tells me that to be alive, able to do routine things, to smile, to understand , to be with ppl who spent their entire lives raising me and now am able to make them smile ... this is life ... wat comes in the future is also life .. but the grass is green where i am i know .. i do not see the other pastures greener than mine, kos god has made them all the same.

love & prayers.
anu kalikal

The Tin Can Men

2008-12-20T02:41:00.000-08:00

They sat in tuna tin cans
Squeezing themselves to leak out.
They grappled with ideas that
Made them prodegies, but still
They rotated within their cans.

Someone once told of a man,
Who lived outside the can.
He gave his stained palms
To the men inside the cans.
And then they saw their past in vain
And gave this man outside the can,
Their breath and gains....

It changed the tin can men into a Man.

Its midnight

2008-12-09T23:13:00.000-08:00

Its midnight and all's asleep,
Am lying in my bed,
My eyes on the small hand of the clock.
The sound of the AC is humming into my ears.
My eyelids close and open,
Not from sleep but without sleep.
My leg make small circles on my mattress.
My fingers count down the seconds
Along with the clock.
Am watching time;
Time is watching me.
Tonight we are companions;
Freinds from birth.
The day is dawning and my night watch is over.

There are more nights to watch;
But first I must face the day;
For then only comes night,
Where I am free to watch time,
And let it slip between the closing of my eyes.

2008-12-09T23:07:00.000-08:00

This is another one i wrote some days after jan 26

Death sperates us at this time,
There was a time when we played,
When we laughed and dreamt the best for each other.
The time when u held my hand when i got scared.
The time when i told you things will work out fine.
Now I am here writing to myself, reading to myself
And stopping myself from calling out to you,
To come and read my thoughts.
I am here alone and you are there.
Far away.

2008-12-09T23:05:00.000-08:00

To comprehend your loss
Is like measuring the sky.
I can do neither of it!

The comparison

2008-12-09T22:57:00.000-08:00

The ugliness in me sticks to the skin of my body.
I take a piece of broken glass and try to scrape it off;
Crumps of me fall in reverend circles within my shadow.
I am there in every business-man and modern executive.
Scores of me chant salutation to wired knowledge.
I lean below to see myself within four legs of breath,
My soul has surpassed them with labels of idiocy and uncleanness.
The image of branded shirts and crisp trousers
Do not grow well on domisticated life;
For leather ties give them names and castes,
That do not cater to be called sensible.
They are the unsung lives of lives loudly sung.

Goodbye brother

2008-12-09T05:11:00.000-08:00

i wrote this two months after 26th jan

Goodbye brother, goodbye dear.
U' ve set sail on a journey to the other shore.
There the sun does not set and the moon does not rise.
The sound of your voice lies fresh in my lap,
I gather it in my fingers and hold it to my bosom;
The warmth your song gives makes me smile from within.
Brother I can hear your laughter and your chiding;
They flow like a stream between my ears.
I rise whenthe sun sets in my world
And smile knowing you' ve gone to your eternal home.

I am the fool...

2008-11-11T01:22:00.000-08:00

I am the fool who called herself wise among the wise;
I am the fool who believed in love when violence ruled;
I am the fool who planted hope in the soil of conflict;
I am the fool who danced in front of Kings who hanged me.

I am dark...

2008-11-11T01:21:00.000-08:00

I am dark yet my mother loves me,
She holds me close to her breasts;
And there I see a white world,
When the known world turned black.

Grace Stood...

2008-11-01T05:50:00.000-07:00

Upon this shore i stood to see
Grace thrown abt for all those flee.
The running, the wicked , the perished ones,
He chose to tell them grace took them all..

There upon the rock standin tall amidst waves,
Grace stood upright, alight and true faced,
The waves crawled upto her knees , it crackled with laughter,
It sang the song of sin wrapped around its neck against grace,
But she stood stil and whispered love that transcends
The hangmans noose , the darkened cellar.

Grace stood and won amidst the waves,
Grace stood and stands amidst the waves,
Grace stood,
Grace stood,
And grace still stands without fail.

The frustrated common man

2008-09-19T01:39:00.000-07:00

Hindi cinema these days are turning sore with all the heroes and heroins simply dancing around trees and all the time falling in and out of love .. but the other day i saw a hindi movie that made me feel that there are some directors out there who do feel the confusion and frustration of the general public. It was called A Wednesday.. it was a sore breath of fresh air. Sore because the subject was the desperation of the common man and the voilence he feels daily around him. The main character takes it upon his stride to bring to judgement the bad people of this world. And since he could not get hold of all of them at one stretch he put lots and chose their fateful names. And then he plans and conducts his method of removing them from the face of this world. Now basicly we would wonder jsut like the Police Inspector did what use is it if we kill just a handful when there are so many other bad people left in the world? I guess our common man simply wanted to do something to calm his senses and bring purpose into his life.

Of course our main character the common man's actions are not to be followed as an example. But it clearly shows how much of unrest there is among the people these days when they are surrounded with nuclear bombs, terrorists and pick pocketers. Life has become a gamble for many. The rare few that live in a secure atmosphere barely realise their blessings and curse the lack of things in their lives. People who live to see the end of a day are now considered people greatly favoured by luck or god whichever suits your religion....

the last she

2008-04-29T06:52:00.000-07:00

Get up and rise
For the storm is over.
Hidden under the rock she stares,
Into the world. No ray has seen her body,
Kept deep within the earth. But now;
Her body eases and squirms out of the ground.
A newborn nakedness clothe her.
The muddy earth stick to her like fear did
All her life; and now the storm is over.
Her eyes drink the peace of the moment.
The earth is soaked old with sons
Young and old stuffed within.
She sits cross-legged and
Counts the sand; there is none.
She walks through fields and tells
Their name; they are none.
The wind blows but cannot be felt;
The dead lay bare and weep her name;
Cursed is she caged within life.

She stands there to know
She is all as living can be called.

i sit cradlled

2008-03-22T23:55:00.000-07:00

I sit craddled in the arms of fear
From within my soul a song is sung
Of weeping and remorse.
The craddle rocks the baby born-still
No hiding place , no resort.
The moon is silent and no lovers kiss;
The leaves sway like my heart in fear.
There comes the storm, the mountain
Darkeness deep within; these arms
That hold me are sucking the life out
And the emptiness left to rot.
Fear speaks like the master
The slave submissive and in chains.
Fear has overcome as I run into a cave.

Twenty years ago

2007-09-17T02:35:00.000-07:00

When we were young
You told me " I will guide you
Cause am elder and you are young."
I nodded my head and followed
You. I took your word for granted
And dreamt this pattern for life.
Twenty years later I am left
Looking at you lying there
Within the four walls of your
Coffin. I reach out my hand
To touch, the coldness runs
Through my blood down my
Spine. I retrieve my hand
And clasp it to my chest.
Memories of your words
Wrap my mind. They form a
Knot in my stomach and
Cramps in my thighs.
I am seated in this chair of life.
Beside me your chair remains
Empty. Noone will come to
Sit and claim to be you.
Twenty years ago you said
" Follow me I am elder
You are young."

Wrapped in silence

2007-09-13T03:33:00.000-07:00

There is noise all around me,
But I am wrapped in silence.
The blood witihin me 've run cold,
And my bones brittle. My chest weaves the air from out
Into a web and causes me to heave And breathe.
My eyes stare at the Lone wooden box, It stares back at me .
Where did you come from? Where are you goiing?
Why dont you tell me instead of the others talking?
My fingers intwine to form a mess of flesh And bones .
All bare. All there. All naked. All there to stare.
And you ... you peacefully lie
Waiting maybe or gone , I do not know.
They tell me myths, they tell me stories,
They tell me answers to questions i never told.
There is noise all around me
But I am wrapped in silence .

the noise in my head

2007-06-22T01:59:00.000-07:00

u know when u head aches nothing really makes sense to u . the only thing u can feel is the thumping noise in ur head . and its the most irritatin and distractin thing in the world. i think conquering a headache is definetly a matter of patience and courage . u need the patience to sit thru it and u need the courage to keep beliving that its gonna end soon . then there s another way of dealing with it and thats actually distracting ur self from it . just doing something that doesnt involve thinking about the head ache. well sometimes it works for me but most of the time am a weak soldier and get hit down ,letting the headache conquer me . well then, the only other solution to the problem then is takin a panadol and hittin the bed covers , with ur pillow on ur head to cover the light out . and then if ur lucky sleep will come and rescue you like prince charning came and saved snow white or rather the latest thing like shrek comes and saves fiona .... hurray the ogres have won ! that means the headache chat is over for now.

blue sunshine

2007-05-15T04:53:00.000-07:00

well its another day . am a day older . evrything seems normal . of course normal has different meanings to different people. wat is normal to me will not be normal to you . but still am gonna say everythign looks normal today .the sun is shining today , well where else should it go in a desert place like this ? it will growl and shout and yell its joy of being alive just as i am happy to be alive and breathing in good health . still today its really shouting . the colour of its life breakin out from between its ribs and flyin across the thousand miles and hitttin me in the forehead. well i respond by every muscle in me wrenching out the water in them . inch by inch it pours out. but does the sun relent ? oh no its does not . not even one bit . it just keeps shoutin like there no death in this lifetime for it .
conclusion . its bloody hot here and i am pretty soon becoming a boiled egg and moving into some other form pretty soon